Building A Foundation of Honesty
Building A Foundation of Honesty
My friends dog died. Well, that's not the entire truth. The truth is her dog had to be put down, he had an aggressive form of cancer. I had the pleasure on more than one occasion of watching her dog and he was an absolute delight in every-way. Our fur-babies got along well. Being a fur-mom and seeing my once vibrant and yapping yorkie Dolce now 13, begin to show signs of aging this news hit me hard. Dolce sleeps a lot more, is pickier about food, and he has a stiff back hip. He doesn't want to walk as long as he used to either. But let another dog walk buy and he's got this gusto that make his act a damn fool. But I digress!
I hadn't talked to my girlfriend in awhile as life has been happening all around. Now however I was not only contacting her about the death of her dog, she tagged me in an Instagram post to let me know; but I was also calling to wish her a Happy Birthday. Her beloved pooch passed two days before. Ain't that a bitch! In any event, we ended up on the phone for well over an hour with a few dropped calls hither and thither and our conversation was just breathtakingly honest.
We discussed the trials and triumphs of entrepreneurship. Her moving back and fourth cross-country twice in 4 weeks. Bank accounts on E and God's glory still on high. I told her about how EstroHaze is featured in this months Ebony Magazine (see video above), and also how I am not going to be at our Miami event (startup life and budget restraints) and while I'm having FOMO God has been so good that its fleeting. Im actually grateful to have dynamic business partners who can get the job done!
My homegirl and I talked about a lot tbt, I shared with her how I was worried about my safety and that of my loved ones with the world cutting up the way it is right now. I mean, the devil is busy!!! But all in all it was good to just be vulnerable and open. Not having to be the marketer, or co-founder. Just friends talking on the phone. Social media has allowed us to share highlights of our lives, and connect with friends and loved ones virtually -- but sometimes we have to pull the curtain back and make a phone call or get some real face-time with folks. You'll uncover a lot more truth that way. My friend is also a pastor, so she was able to reassure me and help me keep my head above the water, cause the truth be told, God didn't give us the spirit of fear.
The title of this blog post coincidentally came from my horoscope over at the DailyOm. That site was one of the first sites I discovered when I was in serious need of inner work. The phrase is so true. Every relationship should be built on a foundation of honesty. No matter how painful the truth might be to hear. I am thankful that my friend and I have such a friendship. We can be open and discuss issues and concerns with each other. She's created a safe space for me and I for her. That's what friendship should be. When I was growing up and trying to figure everything out - especially who my friends really were I tended to put on my ego instead of just being myself. Trying to fit into boxes I was not meant to be in, and tainting relationships before they got a chance to start. What a blessing to be removed from that mindset and able to embrace and rise above my insecurities.
As I break into this NEW season, a time of reinvention I vow to walk in honesty. In fact I am going to challenge myself to go even deeper with the honesty walk. Being a entrepreneur has a wave of emotions and dynamics that have to be dealt with. At the end of the day it's about seeing the bigger picture and being so connected to the mission that you know how to take a setback and turn it into a set up for a major comeback. And the truth of the matter is, when you are honest and own YOUR truth, no one can use it against you.
If you haven't watched The Breakfast Club interview with Jennifer Lewis, do yourself a favor and watch! She is a master at owning and speaking her truth, a woman who built an acting empire on a foundation of honesty.
Aunty Jennifer, thats what I call her will light a fire under you if you struggle to live authentically.
SN: I am not sure what's in her cup, but I doubt that's just caramel macchiato!